No Resolutions

Once a year is too infrequent; and overkill it being a birthday month, on a holiday.  In a continuous state of resolving, to get past barriers.  I don't envy those who make resolutions, even the ones who successfully stick to them and permanently change habits (the rare few).  I just can't relate to that kind of life, where a resolution is an annual thing.  There's no right or wrong.  For some of us, the opportunities come more loudly and something must be done, or it could be gone. 

Maybe it's enviable to be in a place where changing something once a year is all that's needed.  In hindsight, it seems a bit unusual.  Perhaps one resolution begets another we just never hear about.  To know someone well who actually makes one and moves forward is probably to have heard a story of how one conscious change leads to others that add up more over the year.  That sounds more realistic.

Of themselves, they're just campy, and sound weak on the surface, more than marriage as likely as not ending in divorce.  Resolve, once a year.  The more it's said, the less realistic it seems. 

However, actually keeping one, having made one, and what happens after is something we rarely hear about, unless we seek it out, or listen.  Another blip on the screen, that must have many others to follow in order to stay alive...like a heart monitor.  It's real when it creates a momentum all its own.

New Birthday

Birthdays have become cumbersome by a certain age.  I've remained the same age by choice now for several years, and for obvious reasons must now change the claimed age for credibility purposes to another year, by one.  Let's see how long it can carry me. 

My younger sister still looks younger; I don't bother with makeup for a significant number of years now.  I've adopted the Elizabeth Warren with glasses look, with longer hair, and the days are numbered for that as well. 

It was a good birthday this year, for the first time in awhile.  As I didn't really 'have' the birthdays in between, it's pretty much a wash anyway. 

Last night with all the family excitement, us actually being together for a holiday, I again knew what day it was and the overwhelm factor was so strong yet again the evening passed, until today. 

Still recovering, grateful everyone is safe, and scratching the surface of the catching up from what is usually maintained when alone, almost abandoned with family events in progress.   We will all be still recovering for several days from the travel and getting back to life without family together, which in a way seems very much wrong and neither ideal nor optimally functional.  So much more can happen for the better when everyone is together long and often enough.  Staying busy keeps the sadness away.  Productivity is in spurts instead of steady, which would be different otherwise.